i can see you

so as sam, amanda and i were discussing our blogs and writing them and reading them and others reading them (so meta and circular we are) i pondered if there was a blog site hit counter. amanda said that indeed one existed. i said sam should most definitely get one on her shit because she gets a bagillion hits each time she posts, because she is awesome. currently her counter stands at 778 and i installed that shit at the end of last week. impressive. it is interesting to see how many people track you even if they don't technically "follow" you through blogger or whatnot. and although this blog host should give you feedback like facebook does for the administration of a fan page, it doesn't.

i went a huntin for one of these new fangaled contraptions and found me a fancy one. see it at the bottom of the page. although sam rejected this one because it was too busy or too annoying or for whatever reason she gave me, i love this one simply because i can see all of you by location. now that doesn't mean i actually know who is reading, but it gives me a general idea. for example, i think steph's sister read the blog i wrote about her because she is the only person that i know that lives in the city that she does. i know that my friend in wichita has checked it out and also a bunch of people in illinois suburbs that i have never visited. it also lets me know that my ex-boyfriend and now just friend (i guess i should just start referring to him like that) is perhaps stalking this site now (he can be a little ocd) because i have a large number of hits from dublin. either that or he thought my writing was so impressive he got our mutual friends there to read it too. either way i am flattered.

for those who live in larger cities it is harder for me to figure out, but at least i know more people than my 12 "followers" are reading. i was happy with just the 12, but now i really feel honored. so thanks for thinking i am somewhat interesting, or at least odd enough to check out every once in a while. i will attempt to live up to the recognition and stick with this thing for as long as i can. so far it has been a little over a month. wow a year is a long time to commit to something. but don't be shy, click the follow link and i'll show up in your google reader AND i'll know who you are for definite. it's a win win. and if that is too much of a commitment i understand, but just know that i'll be stalking my counter contraption waiting for your town name to pop up.

  

be a mother (earth) lover

happy earth day to the trees, the sky, the flowers, the grass

the water that rushes from oceans into smaller paths

the ants and beetles that march along

and to the birds that sing their morning song.

blah bloggedy blog blah

open kitchen window with irises

i don't have much to say today. feeling a little blah bloggedy blog blah. so i thought i would post this lovely photo and try to think of yesterday, when the rain came and went and i felt less, you guessed it, blah.

this seems to be a general feeling today and, really, this whole week. post birthday/easter blues? or overestimated boy blues? or wishing i could change major parts of my life blues? i think it is a smidge of all three. to all my girls in the struggle. keep on. stay strong. and wait for no one.

this is just to say

so i am officially 30 today and, in a continuation of the efforts i have been making all year to change the way i do things and become rutless, i am attempting to work on my stick-to-it-tiveness. i have chosen this forum to do it. i may not be able to blog everyday, let's face it i don't have that interesting a life, but i want to try to focus on my follow-through and to that end finish something. at the risk of seeming to walk in the bloggity bogged footsteps of the others before me, i will not make this blog about anything for 365 days. except i guess it'll have to be about something. so i am going to share stories and crafts and cakes baked and the like. i like to stay creative and generally crafty so maybe i'll throw something like that up here too. and i have made an effort to keep some pretty great lists. there are movies and music and blogs from some of the sassiest minds i've met yet. so i hope i don't flake on yet another long term project and on my golden birthday next year i'll be blogging about something other than needing to learn how to finish, like how i just won a million dollars or a literary prize, or gasp, a free burrito from chipotle. i think big people!